Confused and Hurt

December 18, 2009

Well this last week has sure been interesting to say the least. I've been so excited to see so many people, and many of them seem genuinely excited to see me. There is just one person though who I was expecting to be a little happier about it. But I guess not.
I'm trying to not jump to conclusions, but I'm getting really hurt along the way anyways.
If I didn't know better I would think this person hates me, but I know that isn't the case.
The person is just trying to do what is best, and help things along. But they are really confusing me. First its basically "I can't wait for you to get home" and now its like "you are home, but we can't hang out". I mean really? I'm so confused right now. This really sucks. I'm really excited to be home, see my family and all that....but then for it to make things harder on that person, and for them to be acting like this. It just really really hurts.
It makes me hate college even more, because I see how split open my life is becoming. I don't fit in up there, and now I don't fit in down here either =(

What happened? Did I do something to change this whole thing? Or even with that one person? Did I upset them? Something?! I feel so lost and confused about this, and I hate it.
I feel like crying, but I don't want to.