Alright

Okay, okay, fine. I still like him as more than just a friend. However, what we are is just friends. To be completely honest, most of the time I am content with that, though occasionally I wish for something more. Right now though, my job is to be a friend and so I shall be. I really think God is teaching me patience, something I am not very good at but am called, as all Christians are, to develop. Having said that, I do not necessarily think that God will allow this friendship to ever be anything more than simply a friendship, that is not really important right now. I think, I am learning to rejoice is the situation He currently has me in. To be patient with what is going on day to day and not try to rush into the future and plan everything. Because, honestly, I would butcher it. Its a blessing He doesn't let me try to plan it all out, because I wouldn't have a clue what would be best for me in 15 years, or even in 5. Luckily, He does. Also, He already knows. So, my job right now, in regards to this guy, this young man, is to be his friend. To love him well. To not try to push things or flirt (with seems to be customary for most American girls in my situation), but to simply and contently be first his sister-in-Christ, to guard my brother-in-Christ's heart, second his friend. There is no third right now, and may never be. But God has given me the joy, yes JOY, of being a friend. Being the person who can give support, encourage him in truth, and remind him of the things he already knows or is failing to see about both himself and Christ. This position, the one of a friend, of a sister, is such a blessing, so simple, so good. I am thankful that this is where I am right now, and I ask God to continue to allow my heart to be content in Him and where He has me. Heavenly Father, thank You, for those You have placed in my life to both love and be loved by. Thank You for the lessons You are teaching me everyday, and thank You for allowing me to so clearly see those lessons some days. I know I struggle to listen and follow You, continue to tug at my heart, to draw me to You. For beyond anything, I need You, to be content in Your love, to see the reality of what Your love is. Your love is more than enough, it is better than all, it is good, it is beautiful. And Lord, thank you for beauty, through colors, sounds, smells, textures, and relationships. Help me to spread Your beauty, through my words and actions. Allow me to highlight Your wonderful creation and not to damage it. I ask all these things in Your wonderful Son's name, Christ Jesus who is my Lord, Savior, Redeemer, King and Friend. With love, to Love. Amen